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Privacy, Shame and Secrets: Hidden in Plain Sight, ct’d

So we return to secrets hidden in plain sight, and particularly to Miriam’s* mentally unstable father, Max,* whom everyone seemed to know about, but no one actually mentioned. Max didn’t come out during the day. Ever. When there were certain things he wanted–usually food requests, he never wanted clothes or books or gifts for the […]

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Privacy, Shame and Secrets–Who Owns the Secret?

Patty was pregnant with her second when she and Peter sought conseling for marital tension. During their couples’ work, they revealed that both pregnancies had required in vitro assistance. The issue of secrets came up with a double-whammy.  Part I was the revelation that the parents had no intention of ever telling their children that […]

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Privacy, Secrets and Shame: How to Reveal a Secret, cont.

Back to ideas about how best to reveal a secret. It can’t hurt to start where we left off–using your common sense. Other tips: don’t construct a whole back story behind your secret to cover your guilt. I know it’s tempting–I really do–but the moment when you finally share your secret is not the time for excuses or […]

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Privacy, Shame and Secrets: Hidden in Plain Sight

“Brilliant!” Harry whispered. “If everyone knows, no one will suspect it’s a secret!” No, it isn’t really “the Harry” that we’ve come to know and love via Ms. Rowling. It’s rather from a takeoff of the Potter series, Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality by Less Wrong. [Feel free to see if this idea appeals to […]

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